Mickificki

So . . . it seems strange to me that we as a society still have major issues with the idea of swearing on television.  While coarse language may not be an ideal, and isn't necessarily something we deliberately teach our children to use, it is pretty much used by everyone.  Just like the notion that on television a couple in bed before or after sex is always covered up to shoulder-level, a lack of profanity on TV just doesn't reflect reality.  More on this, some profanity, and the death of the sitcom, and some fun clips after the jump.


This issue of bad language on TV came to a head recently when the so-called Parent's Television Council (I'm a parent and I wasn't consulted) lashed out against the new pinnacle of awfulness that is $#*! My Dad Says (pronounced by CBS as Bleep My Dad Says and by the rest of the world as That Shitty Shit Show).  It is a TV show based on a Twitter feed and stars William Shatner ('nuff said).  Unfortunately the PTC wasn't protesting bad television, but rather the title - they claim that any affiliate carrying the program is associating their brand with excrement (referring to title, not content).

Don't these people have better things to do with their time?  It is certainly possible that kids watching the show will start swearing, but a) so what? and b) they're gonna start swearing eventually anyway.  And parents could, you know, parent their children, and not only prevent them from watching it, but actually explain why, and explain their values, and explain that real world problems should be ignored in favour of making sure kids' swearing tendencies are delayed as long as possible.

(Speaking of shit on television, can someone please recommend a decent sitcom that is better than, say, a Golden Girls re-rerun, i.e. at least somewhat funny.  Please do not recommend any of the following, as I have tried them and they are not funny: Community, Parks and Recreaion, Modern Family, The Big Bang Theory, Cougartown, Two and a Half Men.  I can tell from watching them that they are supposed to be funny, but they do not have the desired effect of, you know, making people laugh.  The only current sitcom I watch is The Office, and I'm getting caught up on 30 Rock.  And no, the problem is not me, I have an excellent sense of humour.)

Anyway, this whole swearing-on-television thing made me think of how they used to dub movies when they were on TV (instead of the more common current practice of just blanking out the swearing).  As a result we got words like "Mickificki" to replace, well, you know, when a movie was on TV.  Mickificki was used extensively on the TV edit of Do the Right Thing.  And you got dialogue like the "Piece of Tin" scene from Ferris Bueller's Day Off, where Ferris and Cameron are arguing over whether a car is a piece of "tin."

I have some youtube links to some examples of this, but I'd like to start with one that I couldn't find anywhere (a shame) from the movie Major League.  In a pivotal scene Corbin Bernsen approaches a pre-whorey Charlie Sheen (was he actually pre-whorey or just not as famous?) and tells him to strike this motherfucker out.  In the TV version, however, they decided to replace the MF word with "guy."  Because the original word is much longer, the line became "Strike this guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuy out."

Okay, the links:

- Here's a compilation from the movie Casino, with it's own social commentary at the end.  I like the use of "maggot" for an offensive term that rhymes, and the ever-popular "freaking."  If you're going to say "freaking" and everyone knows what you really mean, why do you need to euphemize?

- Another compilation, this time from Pulp Fiction.  Points for creativity, like the use of a different MF ("my friend") at around 3:20 mark.  Lots of "damn" and "screw," so again I ask why dub at all.

- Last compilation, this one from Die Hard 2.  Very bad dubbing.  Has the famouns "Yippie Kai Yay" line at the end, and they inserted "Mister Falcon," a reference to a minor plot point where the guy in the plane has the code name "Falcon."  This turned into fodder for a Wikipedia parody site that lists lots of these dubs.

- Here's a parody of all of this stuff from MadTV (lacking the ubiquity of SNL, but it had its moments).

- The opening scene from the Usual Suspects, where an offensive line gets a family-friendly makeover five times.

- And finally, the best one I found on youtube, the best-known line from Snakes on a Plane.  High points for creativity.  And from what I've heard, the revised line actually fits with the plot.

Now can we get over this swearing shit?