Thursday, July 29, 2010

Concussive Window Dressing in the NFL

So . . . apparently smashing your head against someone else's repeatedly over a three-hour period is not good for your brain. So say researchers who are examining the long-term impact of playing football, and the head injuries that go along with it. In fact, the results are downright disturbing (see Malcolm Gladwell's article on the subject for a more in-depth look).

The NFL had been denying and ignoring the issue, and with good cause; if the league were to take on this topic seriously, it would necessitate such big changes to the game that the very survival of football as we know it would be at stake. But yesterday the league announced a wide-ranging, hands-on approach to dealing with the long-term effects of concussive and sub-concussive injuries. They created a poster.

Calm down, calm down. I know that this is a major policy move for commissioner Goodell. A whole poster (actually, 32 of them - one in each team's locker room) may seem like going overboard, but I think such bold action is necessary. And this poster does more than just hang on the wall. It also informs the players that getting hit in the head is bad for your long-term health. And to not play if you have a head injury.

Because sarcasm does not lend itself well to the written form, you may think I'm a bit nuts right now. Just re-read the previous paragraph in an overly dramatic and slightly sneering tone.

This poster is going to accomplish one thing and one thing only - to dress the windows. To half-assedly say that the league regards this issue seriously and will do something about it (they won't, unless forced). Because no highly-payed, over-juiced NFL player is going to read that poster and say, "Really? I never knew. I should give this up and go be an accountant." The poster has a greater probability of being used as toilet paper than affecting the thinking of a single player. These are men who have given their blood, sweat and tears to achieve one goal and one goal only - to get to the NFL. They are focused on winning, on battling, on doing what is asked of them. To admit that there is a risk they had not previously considered, and to capitulate in the face of that risk, is to deny the very essence of who they are.

If you truly want to stop the long-term effects of playing football, start early. Get them while they're kids and high-schoolers, and make plain the risks. Trot out an old, doddering former pro who has even more trouble putting together a coherent sentence than he did when he had all of his faculties. Scare 'em. And then despair when the kids choose to continue banging their heads.

Because ultimately, that's what's going to happen. Just like all of the corner boys who earn less than minimum wage slinging drugs, in the hope that they will be the survivor who gets to be boss. Just like in that episode of Sliders where you can take as much cash out of the ATM as you want, but each dollar is an entry into a lottery where the prize is death (damn right I watched Sliders, you know, on occasion, when nothing else was on). People constantly take risks to earn rewards, even when the rewards are unlikely to occur.

The bottom line is that people like watching football, there are more than enough people willing to play football despite the risks (and earn a lot more than accountants do), so who are we to stop them? And while we're at it, I saw that movie Gladiator, we should get back to doing that too.

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